Why Truth is never boring?

Most relationships die slow deaths—not from lack of love, but from lack of truth. When I see couples together for years, I smell comfort, safety and often, boredom. But I don’t judge—I’ve been there.

So why do relationships lose their spark? Because people stop telling the truth. They avoid conflict. They chase security. They suppress emotions. Or worse—they lie to themselves.

And if you’re lying to yourself, how can you possibly be honest with someone else?

After losing a three-year relationship, months of grieving, and more therapy and coaching sessions than I care to admit, I learned something that changed everything:

If I want the kind of relationship I actually desire, I have to be 100% honest with myself. Not kind of. Not mostly. Fully.

And that kind of honesty forces growth. It also acts as a filter. When you start speaking the truth, some people won’t like it. They’ll resist. They’ll fall away. And that’s okay. Because if someone isn’t ready to be honest with themselves, they’re not meant to be in your life anyway.

But here’s the part no one talks about: truth isn’t just about saying what’s on your mind. It’s about how you say it.

Unprocessed emotions break connections. Your emotions? They belong to you. Not to your partner. Not to your friends. If you’ve been holding them in for too long, they won’t come out as wisdom. They’ll come out as anger, frustration, resentment. And that’s your responsibility to deal with before bringing them into a conversation.

Truth—when spoken with clarity and regulation—doesn’t push people away. It builds intimacy.

So before you speak, ask yourself two things:

1. Am I grounded? If you’re emotionally charged, your truth won’t land—it’ll explode.

2. Am I creating a safe space for the other person to actually hear me? If they don’t feel safe, they won’t listen.

As my mentor Richard says:

If your relationship has lost its spark, start here: tell the f*cking truth.

And if you want to go deeper—DM me. I love holding space for this work.